Twas during the shutdown... and Speaker of the House

‘‘Twas during the shutdown....and Speaker of the House,
tried to leave town...quiet as a mouse.
Pelosi was all packed...she was ready to go.
But Trump sent a letter, “I don’t think so....”
“You can’t use my plane,” he said with glee,
“You must stay here and negotiate with me!”
She said, “What nerve! What gall!”
Trump said, “ Tough shit! I’m getting my wall!”

Obscure National Holiday "U.S. Congressman's Day"

Brings a tear to your eye 

I was eating breakfast with my teenage granddaughter and I asked her, "What special day is it tomorrow?

Without skipping a beat she said, "It's U.S. Congressman's Day.

She's smart, so I asked her "What does that mean?" I was not ready for what she was about to say.

She replied, "U.S. Congressman's Day is when they step out of the Capital Building and see their shadow, and we have 4 more years of Bull Shit.

You know, it hurts when hot coffee spurts out your nose.