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FINALLY - REDEMPTION FOR BLONDES

       A lawyer boarded an airplane in New Orleans with a box of frozen crabs
and asked a blonde stewardess to take care of them for him .  She took
the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator .  He advised her
that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen,
mentioning in a very haughty manner that he was a lawyer, and proceeded
to rant at her about what would happen if she let them thaw out .  Needless
to say, she was annoyed by his behavior .
 
Shortly before landing in New York , she used the intercom to announce to
the entire cabin, "Would the lawyer who gave me the crabs in New Orleans ,
please raise your hand?" Not one hand went up, so she took them home
and ate them .
 
Two lessons here:
1 . Lawyers aren't as smart as they think they are .
2 . Blondes aren't as dumb as some folks think .
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The Spaghetti Affair


SPAGHETTI............A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for several years. One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that she was pregnant.
Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he would pay her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child.

If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18. She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.

To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write "Spaghetti" on the back.
He would then arrange for child support payments to begin.One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
His wife said, "Honey, you received a very strange post card today." "Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it," he said. The wife handed him the card and watched as her husband read the card, turned white and collapsed.

On the card was written: "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without! Request bread.....

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