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Confucius Did Not Say...

Confucius Did Not Say...
cid:6628feb2-c2db-bc9e-c619-d6f7f2e5693c@yahoo.com

Man who wants pretty nurse must be patient.
 
Passionate kiss like spider web, leads to undoing of fly.
 
Lady who goes camping with man must beware of evil intent.
 
Squirrel who runs up woman's leg will not find nuts.
 
War does not determine who is right; it determines who is left.
 
Man who fights with wife all day get no piece at night.
 
It takes many nails to build a crib, but only one screw to fill it.
 
Man who drives like hell is bound to get there.
 
Wise man does not keep sledge hammer and slow computer in same room.
 

"A lion will not cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood!"


A wise person does take care of their health.  
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The Spaghetti Affair


SPAGHETTI............A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for several years. One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that she was pregnant.
Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he would pay her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child.

If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18. She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.

To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write "Spaghetti" on the back.
He would then arrange for child support payments to begin.One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
His wife said, "Honey, you received a very strange post card today." "Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it," he said. The wife handed him the card and watched as her husband read the card, turned white and collapsed.

On the card was written: "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without! Request bread.....

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