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The Robot Bartender

The Robot Bartender 1. A guy goes into a bar in California's Silicon Valley, where there is a robot bartender serving drinks. The robot asks in a metallic humanoid voice, “What will you have?” The guy replies, “Whiskey.”
 
2. The robot brings back his drink and asks, “What’s your IQ?” The guy says, “168.” The robot continues on to talk to him about molecular physics, space exploration, and medical technology.

3. After the guy leaves and the more he thinks about it, the more curious he gets, so he decides to go back. The robot asks, “What’s your drink?” The guy answers, “Whiskey.” The robot returns with his drink and asks, “What’s your IQ?” The man replies, “100.”
4. The robot then talks about NASCAR, Budweiser, deer season, the 49ers, the Raiders & the Dodgers. The man finishes his drink, leaves, but is so interested in his “experiment” that he decides to try again. He enters the bar &, as usual, the robot asks him what he wants to drink.
5. The man replies, “Whiskey.” The robot brings the drink and asks, “What’s your IQ?” The man answers, “35.”
6. The robot leans in real close and asks, “So ... Do you folks really think you’re going to impeach Donald Trump?” ///The end.
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The Spaghetti Affair


SPAGHETTI............A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for several years. One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that she was pregnant.
Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he would pay her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child.

If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18. She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.

To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write "Spaghetti" on the back.
He would then arrange for child support payments to begin.One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
His wife said, "Honey, you received a very strange post card today." "Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it," he said. The wife handed him the card and watched as her husband read the card, turned white and collapsed.

On the card was written: "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without! Request bread.....

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