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Thursday

The Three Little Pigs - Italian Style

Once upon a time there were three little pigs. The straw pig, the stick pig and the brick pig.

One day this nasty old wolf came up to the straw pig's house and said, "I'm gonna huff and puff and blow your house down." And he did !!!


So the straw pig went running over to the stick pig's house and said, "Please let me in, the wolf just blew down my house." So the stick Pig let the straw pig in.

Just then the wolf showed up and said, "I'm gonna huff and puff and blow your house down." And he did !!!


So the straw pig and the stick pig went running over to the brick pig's house and said, "Let us in, let us in, the big bad wolf just blew our houses ; down!"

So the brick pig let them in just as the wolf showed up The wolf said, "I'm gonna huff and puff and blow your house down." The straw pig and the stick pig were so scared! But the brick pig picked up the phone and made a call.


A few minutes passed and a big, black Caddy pulls up.

Out step two massive pigs in pin striped suits and fedora hats. These pigs come over to the wolf, grab him by the neck and beat the living shit out o f him, then one of them pulled out a gun, stuck it in his mouth and fired, killing the wolf, then they tied cement blocks around his feet threw his sorry ass into the creek then they got back into their Caddy and& nbsp; drove off.


The straw pig and stick pig were amazed!!! "Who the hell were those guys?" they asked.




"Those were my cousins... the Guinea Pigs
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The Spaghetti Affair


SPAGHETTI............A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for several years. One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that she was pregnant.
Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he would pay her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child.

If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18. She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.

To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write "Spaghetti" on the back.
He would then arrange for child support payments to begin.One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
His wife said, "Honey, you received a very strange post card today." "Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it," he said. The wife handed him the card and watched as her husband read the card, turned white and collapsed.

On the card was written: "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without! Request bread.....

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